Although it’s still early days I am finally using my gym membership to the max. Whether this is down to getting rid of some negativity from my life I’m not sure but I’ve tried 2 different classes so far. Although I am in pain it feels good. I am hoping that over time my confidence in myself will improve. If I feel good I will look good right?
I am in a position where I do want to meet someone. Internet dating isn’t working for me and hasn’t done since I started a few years ago so what are my options?
3 years ago I started joining a local group called meet up. People in your local area organising random events to meet new people. This has disintegrated over the past year and I have met some lovely amazing people through it and although I haven’t come close to meeting someone I want to date I guess I wasn’t ready back then and the group I went to on a regular basis wasn’t a dating group.
Unfortunately the dating groups are based in London which isn’t suitable for me when I live just outside and with the trains as they are at the moment it would take me a day to get into London itself nevermind the meeting point.
I am waiting on a new writing group to lift off. I am not sure where it will be based yet but hopefully it will be a reasonable distance. I am not sure if writing groups will encourage the late 20s to mid 30s group but who knows.
I am hoping that meeting someone this way over meeting over the Internet will mean they will be less judgemental and actually want to get to know people rather than looking at a picture and making a decision based on it. It’s frustrating that people reject others based on a picture or know what charming words to say in order to get what they really want.
The other day I was asked if I was shy. Why does it matter if I am or not? He wanted to meet up straight away and maybe that’s for some people it’s not for me especially when I didn’t even know his name! I need at least a couple of days before jumping in. Maybe it’s down to past experience. I once ended up waiting 9 months to meet a guy because he broke his leg a couple of days before we were suppose to meet up and even talking for that length of time didn’t enlight the spark. I would never wait that long again and I don’t know why I did in this case.
Although it happens I find it exhausting that I go from date to date and just get nowhere. My confidence also goes after each date didn’t end well . I am a firm believer that you need a spark but I also believe that it doesn’t always happen straight away especially since the first date is normally about breaking the ice and starting to feel comfortable with each other.
Last year I met someone and looking back I should of left it to him but I took the bull by the horns and we ended up going on another date and I slowly started to like him. It didn’t end well and this was an example of him saying all the right things to get what he wanted.
Dating shouldn’t be this hard and stressful. Worried about what to wear, worried about the scars you have had since you were born, worried about meeting his friends and family even worried about how you look in the morning when you have just woken up.
My friends tell me that it will happen and I’m sure they are right but when it’s been so long since my last date I am always going to be doubtful.
It will be a shock to the system when someone does come along and actually wants to be with me. Whether I will recognise it or think it’s another trap leading me into a false sense of security. Well that’s the question.
But I don’t want to miss out on a good thing. So here’s to another number of disaster dates which will hopefully lead to a successful one.